I have to be in charge in the work place, how do I shift gears to submit at home?!

What would you say to a sub who has to be a alpha in the work place and after a long hard day at work has a hard time letting the walls back down to be the sub to his master?

That’s a really great question. I have a few thoughts, but if you can… I’d like to ask you why is it hard to let the walls down when you get home? Is this something you’ve always had an issue with? Is it hardest during the work week? Are there any times when entering subspace is easy for you?

I still have some general thoughts but if I could have an answer to those questions I could probably be a bit more specific

1.       Relax - When you come home, designate some time to decompress from your day (however you do that). A Master is a being of many endless wants. If he cares about you he needs to give you some space when you get home for however long you need. The most important thing to remember about subs and doms alike is that we’re all people and we need time to be people for a bit. That leads into my next suggestion.

2.       Ritual - If you can, make your relaxation into a ritual. For example, come home draw a hot bath, soak for 30 minutes, dry off, and put your collar on and kneel before your Master. Rituals are simply anything you do day after day without fail to help yourself fall into a headspace. If you have no idea how to create a ritual to get into the right headspace you should first identify what relaxes you that you could do daily. Then think about the things that make you feel submissive (or at minimum horny) and make a small list. See if anything on that list can be tacked on after the relaxation. Once you’ve got a submissive headspace established, and then conclude the ritual with a show to your Master that you’re ready. This last part is helpful as it is a mental cue to start your submission.

3.       Serve less often - I do not know the situation with your Master, but if you’re being called on to serve too often and aren’t having any down time… as much fun as it is to serve, you could start to view submission as a chore rather than fun. However often you’re serving, ask to serve 3 or 4 times a week so you can have the downtime to be more resilient after your work days.

4.       Meditate - Meditation is also very helpful because if you can learn to clear your mind it serves as a bookmark to both the work day and a start to the time you need to submit. It can easily be incorporated into your ritual.

Let me know how this goes. Or also let me know if you have a bit more info for me. Good luck!

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